Friday, March 16, 2007

One-on-One with Mom

I've been asking God to show me some things to teach my children to be like Him, to help their spiritual lives mature as they grow up. And over the past few days, He gave me an idea - to spend 1:1 time with them individually. Not to just run to the grocery store so they each get time with me by themselves. Oh, that idea is great and fine, and we do that when I can (Daddy being gone makes that hard), but no, I'm speaking of a more purposeful time alone together.

The goal of this time together would be to really get at their heart. To ask them, how is your heart doing? Are you struggling with any areas lately? What can I pray for? Are you afraid of anything? What is God telling you in your Bible time? (This last question will be when they are old enough to have their personal devotions. Mine aren't old enough yet.) This time will be to pray together, to talk of their dreams and hopes for their life in the future, to talk about anything bothering them, and so on. Also, this would be a good time for me to be open with them about my own failures and struggles, and to ask their forgiveness when I've made mistakes.

My hope for this is to let them see that I care personally how they are doing on the inside and out. I want this to deepen their trust of Mommy. I also hope this will open doors for me to intimately "disciple" my children as they know Christ as their Savior.

Churches disciple their new Christians - or they certainly should; many churches have discipleship programs. Do we as parents have a purposeful discipleship with our children? Do we have a time to address their individual needs?

But I hope this time won't be all seriousness. I don't want it to be stiff. I hope it's filled with lots of laughter and giggling, too. I don't want it to be like a report-card interview. I want it to be a sweet time. And so I need to start it now, while my daughter is five. She'll have no expectations of Mom coming into her room and sitting down to talk. We can start off these memories with lots of giggles over her made-up jokes and stories. I can tell her my own made-up stories (she loves these at bedtime) just for her. And we can talk about her fear of the dark, and Mommy's fears (not too much detail here for her little mind) letting her know I get afraid, too, and how I take my fears to God and so can she. We can pray together, read the Bible together, and just have fun being Mommy and Daughter.

I have high hopes for this idea God gave me. May He bless it richly!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

When my kids were little (they're 20, 16 and 12 now), I would try to make sure to spend time one-on-one reading aloud to them from spiritually engaging books. I'd read to my kids together frequently, but I found that one-on-one time, cuddled up on the couch or my bed with a good book dealing with spiritual topics, opened many a door into their hearts. We not only have read some great books, we've had some excellent heart-to-heart talks inspired by things we were reading.

~Debi

Lily said...

Debi, thank you so much for that idea! Excellent advice! I am really glad you left this comment.