Gentleness

I've not been very patient with the kids lately, as you know. I'd love to say that after I wrote that post that everything righted itself, but it did not. That fix was a temporary one. I'm still hormonal and grumpy. And tired. And short-tempered. And tired. And hormonal. And tired. LOL

But as I was having my time with the Lord this morning (a challenge for me, but I can't keep my evening routine of studying because with dh here at night now, it isn't working out), my attention was caught by this phrase in Psalm 18:35 - "thy gentleness hath made me great." David was speaking of God's gentleness. That's a rather unique phrase in scripture, isn't it? And it caught my attention. I mulled over it awhile, thinking how did God's gentleness make David great?

Hmmm, well, David (and I, for that matter) did not deserve God's gentleness. What we all deserve is God's immediate judgment for the sins we commit, right? But He is gentle with us. Long suffering. Patient.

God was gentle with David, instead of harsh, and through time and patience on God's part, David slowly became what he was.

Hmmm. This is what my children need of me. Gentleness. Not snapping at them when I've told them 100 times... or on my snippy days, told them twice and now have no tolerance. They need from me a lifetime of gentleness, mercy, discipline, and love to mold them into what God would have them be.

That brings up a question: how is discipline gentle? What is the alternative? With God, discipline is the gentle option. Loving guidance that, yes, sometimes is SO upleasant and painful. Is it fun when He brings us through difficult trials to bring us back to Him? Nope. Unpleasant and painful. But what is the alternative? Do you know where I'd be without Him? Do you know how horrible my life would be without Him? And my ETERNITY without Him? *shudder* Oh, His discipline IS the gentle option.

So it is with us as parents. Our discipline is the gentle option, or else our children will grow to be unruly, disrespectful, disobedient... and unhappy adults. But also, practically speaking... if I'm being harsh, I'm getting in the way of my children actually seeing where they were wrong. If their eyes are HUGE because I'm wigging out over their 300th argument of the day, how can they see anything but my hissy fit and frustration? How can I ever get them to focus on their part in it all if they are just intimidated by Mom and thinking they don't want to cross me again?

I do think it is ok for our children to see us angry over their sin. God gets angry with us. But my discipline and my treatment of them should never be in the heat of my irritation or anger.

Sigh. I've failed miserably lately. Yeah, I know, the hormones aren't my fault and make things harder. I know you've all been there. But it doesn't excuse being a shrew. My hormones aren't their problem. It is mine.

Military Mommy has a great post that is along these lines, too. Her prayer at the end is so right on. It is wonderfully convicting and encouraging, all at the same time. Take the time to check it out.