Sniff... I'll miss you, dear friend!

If you see me hugging the TVs at the nearest electronics store, don't be surprised.

Hubby decided that we are not going to get the cable hooked up at the new house. I haven't told the kids yet, lol. I'm having enough struggles at the thought myself!! How will I get fresh ideas for decorating my new abode if I can't watch those decorating and decluttering shows? *insert ringing of the hands and loud wailing*

Seriously, I have my shows I will greatly miss. (At least Gilmore Girls had their series finale before we cut the tv off!) And it will be requiring some creativity on my part, as now I sometimes use the tv to distract the kids while I do a chore they cannot be a part of. Or if I need to doze on the couch for an hour. Or if I need a shower. LOL

On the flip side, I won't have tv tempting me away from those other projects that I've wanted to do for awhile. Or needed to do, lol.

So I've included a haiku entitled, "Farewell, Boob Tube." Enjoy.

Farewell, Boob Tube.

How I will miss you,
Little box of phosphorus.
Say hi to tivo.

Jeopardy question of the day

Question: What is, "Throbbing?"

Answer:

Sunshine told me, "Mommy, my cheek is breathing." After listening to the story of how she and her little sister had collided, we discovered she was feeling a throbbing in her cheek. Don't you love her attempt at describing the feeling?

Hello... Goodbye... Hello

Life until we close on the house looks like this: hubby gone during weekdays 4 hours away at his new post, home with us on the weekends. He's staying in the barracks there while we are still here with my parents.

Knowing we are saying goodbye for only a few days at a time is so much better! It is a bit confusing to our 3 yr old, especially, but hubby and I are much happier. He called me last night and said, "This is our first night of just two nights apart." What a wonderful realization! He was teasing me that it was all for the best, easing back into seeing each other regularly. Because, afterall, there's all those socks of his to pick up now. :)

FYI

At the gentle push and nudge of a certain bloggy friend, and you know who you are *wink, wink*, I added the option to email me to my profile. So if you'd like to drop me a line one day, now you may do so.

I wanted to add it directly to my blog, but I must be challenged in this area, as I could not figure out how to do it. Any tips would be appreciated.

Overheard the girls talking

We have all sorts of ants around here - different colors, different sizes. The girls think that, in life, anything smaller is a baby and anything bigger is a grownup. So the girls saw a stray tiny ant exploring, and this is what ensued.

Both exclaiming over and over in tiny, adoring voices: "Oh, look at the baby ant! Mommy, did you see the baby ant? It's so cuuuuuute! That baby ant is so tiny! Mommy, did you see the baby ant? Awwwww!"

Sugar-n-Spice, in a very pitying voice: "That baby ant looks lost. Poor. baby. ant. It needs its mommy. I bet it's cold. It needs a pillow and a blanket."

Sunshine, who has suddenly lost her cutesy voice, now speaks in a scornful tone: "Ants do NOT use pillows and blankets. It's an ant."

Me these days

I'm having so much trouble being motivated with hubby here. Do the rest of you experience that, too? Even when life was "normal" and he had a day off, it felt like I did, too, and housework almost always went out the window. And now? Multiply that feeling by about 3000%. I'm getting the absolutely bare minimum done around here. Which I feel guilty about. I'm the only one cleaning and cooking for this household of now 8 people. (Well, the girls help, but they depend on me for the prodding, and when you are having trouble prodding yourself, how much prodding of others do you get done? Exactly.)

I've even been slack on exercising. I just would much rather lie in bed with him in the mornings, instead of rising at 5:30 to exercise. Hmmm, cuddle with my man or get up and sweat alone before the sun is up? Cuddle? Sweat? Cuddle? Sweat? Yeah. It took me about 1.3 seconds to decide that one.

Emotionally, I'm a whole mess of weird. Excited about the new house, happy he's home, preoccupied with thoughts of what-color-will-I-paint-that-room, and then, outta nowhere, I'll feel like bursting into tears. I just want to sit down and bawl, but I can't do that. Then hubby would want to know what's wrong. And I just don't wanna have that conversation.

I dunno, maybe I'm just having a reaction to fi-nuh-lee having him home and the emotional stress it was to have him gone, especially under the circumstances. Or maybe its the stuff that I know isn't fixed between us yet. Or maybe its the stress (though exciting) of a new house and moving again... who knows. I just wish it would go away.

Speaking of an exciting move - I am SO eager to get going! That house is so big, and after being cramped up in our old place for so long, and now more than a year in my parents' home (too small for both families), I'm ready to breathe. I'm eager to unpack our things and rediscover all my own stuff again. I am so giddy at the thought of arranging the rooms as I like it and living in clutter-free spaces!!!!!!!!!

Sweetheart and Daddy bonding

Sweetheart was only... let me do the math here... 16 months old when we moved here to my parents' home and hubby was gone in another state. From time to time, we'd get a short visit from hubby, but no significant "bonding" happened between them, really. Sweetheart does remember him, but Daddy means something completely different to him than he does to the older girls.

Sweetheart is very intimidated by Daddy. I can see why... Daddy is a big fella and has some pretty intense eyes. And Daddy just has that something about him that can be pretty intimidating.

When Sweetheart is scolded by Daddy, Sweetheart cries pretty hard, but tries to hold it in, like he's afraid to even cry. With Mommy, Sweetheart wails his little heart out and lets me know exactly what he is feeling. But he acts like a deer in the headlights with Daddy. And when Daddy tries to show Sweetheart lovin', it doesn't always go over well.

So Daddy has started something new in the morning - he makes coffee for himself and Sweetheart. Sweetheart's "coffee" is just a smidge of coffee with a more-than-generous helping of milk and sugar. They go out on the front porch together each morning and drink their coffee. I have to say it is the sweetest thing I've ever seen.

Hubby and his dad never were very close. Hubby's dad just isn't a people person (which is funny, as he is a pastor). He'd be very happy to be a hermit with his books. Truly. He did love his boys, but he didn't do dad stuff with them, and my hubby wants differently for his boy and himself. It's going to be a challenge with hubby gone so much. But I love that he is actively seeking to get that going.

I love that when the kids are outside, he runs at them and tackles them to the ground. I love their squeals of delight and surprise. I love that he "wrestles" with Sweetheart and does those chest-bumps that fellas do.

It does my heart so much good to see them together.

WE GOT THE HOUSE!!

Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

I'm so thrilled! Our very first home! And, depending on the sleeping arrangements... I just may be able to make the one bedroom that is downstairs into a SCHOOLROOM! Yippee! I'll be picking your brains later.

Oh, this house is great - lots of room for us. Our last home was 900 sq.ft. And with 5 of us, that was c-r-o-w-d-e-d. This house? This house is 2480 sq.ft. - can you believe it?! We have an upstairs, main floor, and a partial basement. Hubby is gonna have himself a "man room," lol! (He cannot say "man room" without lowering his voice a few octaves, lol!)

And speaking of the hubster, guess who's home??? *insert huge grin here* When he drove up, we all went tearing out the front door, and the two older girls attacked him. Our fella went out slower, as he barely remembers who Daddy is, and there isn't that bond between them yet. But he did give Daddy a hug. Shortcake keeps smiling at her daddy, though she has no clue who he is. She is doing a lot of staring at him, studying his face, too.

My parents are not here tonight - they are giving us alone time as a family. (Hubby is in the shower right now, which is why I'm blogging now.) Aren't they wonderfully considerate?

Well, nothing else to report. Happiness all around here!

I left - did ya miss me?

We left the state Monday night, and Tuesday looked at houses in the town we'll be living in... and drove home again... with all four kids in tow. It was a good trip! We were in the van a lot, but they were so good. I say we, because my mom went with me to help.

My mom had me in STITCHES. The jokes rambled from how she'll wind up as one of those old ladies who are greeters at Walmart ("Hi, HAWNey! Welcome to Walmartss. Did you bring back a return?"), good looking gay men vs ugly gay men (oh, don't ask!), and a few other oddball things that are only funny if you were there at that specific moment. You know the kind. The kind of moment that is very lame when you try to relate it to someone else? Yeah, that kind. But oh HOW we laughed at the time.

One of my favorite moments, though, was when Mom was talking about giving a strip T. A what? A strip T. I burst out laughing... "Mom? It's strip teaSE." More howling from me. Thing is, she misunderstands a lot of words like this. She is a smart lady, but somehow misses stuff like this, which makes it even funnier. If you read This Ain't New York, then you might have seen the post about the Allstate commercial. If you didn't, go quickly and read it - it is very, very short, but oh so funny. Ok... did you read it? Well, GO read it. Ok... now that you've read it, my mom thought the same thing. In fact, I was giggling and telling Mom about Melanie's hubby's mistake, and Mom just sat there smiling all the while. Then she admitted that she, too, thought it was Stan. Bwahahahahaha!

Anyway, so back to the house stuff... tomorrow we hope to make an offer. I'm very excited. Keep turning it over and over in my head. Let's see, do we put Sunshine and Sugar-n-Spice in that bedroom, or do we put them in the other? Do we turn the extra room downstairs into a schoolroom or do we use it for our bedroom? You know, all the life-altering, mind-blowing questions that will affect me for eternity. Oh brother. Still, can't seem to get my mind to stop twirling it over and over.

But the best part? The bestest? (Yes, I know that is not proper.) Hubby will be here Friday night! I won't be sleeping alone anymore!!! WHOOOOOPEEEE! It will be so wonderful to feel someone's arms around me when I fall asleep. Happy day... er, night!

Wonderful message from dh for Mother's Day

My hubby sent me an ecard for Mother's Day. (Ecards are really awesome for us... he is horrible with a capital "H" at getting and giving cards. Plus, we are hundreds of miles apart!)

And inside the card, the message read:

"I love you, Babe. You are everything I could ever wish for in a Mom for my babies."

I think that's the best thing a man can ever say. Don't you?

Typing with Shortcake

is a very hard thing to do. I thought I'd type and not fix the typose so you can see who she affects my writing. Ritght now she is playing with the mouse and keyboard, so letters are getting shifted around.

47iuIsn't it fun when they get curious about what you are doing and want to do it too?,




idea how she does some of the stuf fshe does. Like no? some how now I'm typing above where I was. Go figure. 76
JI\76ahv6e no
She pu41
lls up all sorts of swinowsd and programs with a smack of her tiny hand on the keyboard. I've been using computers for a very long time, and yet she knows shortcuets I do not.

Ok, I put her down. And she's none too happy about it, either, lol. But you can see all the stuff I have to fix when she is with me.

Sugar-n-Spice's 3 yr old "isms"

Here are some cute mistakes Sugar-n-Spice has made lately when speaking:

"Mommy, I can hear Sunshine's heart beeping!"

"Mommy, can you scrap me in?"

...well, phooey. There was a third one and now I can't remember it.

Hard as nails... not

We found a buyer advocate or buyer's agent or buyer brokerage... whichever term you prefer. Now the excitement is settling in for me! I've got about 3 houses that I'm more interested in than the others.

But I felt so sorry today... one of the realtor's called and I had to let her know we were working with someone now. She was very disappointed, and I felt horrible. She said, "Well, I could have done that for you." I had no idea. She didn't present herself as that. The lady we went with did from the very beginning and was very up front about her business approach and ethics. But I can't help feeling sorry for this other woman. Maybe that's silly, though. Perhaps I'd better get over it, as I've got a few other realtors I'm gonna have to tell. Not looking forward to that. Maybe I'm just too "soft." This is perhaps the reason my hubby has the most success with telemarketers and customer service agents? LOL

Seriously, if we have beef with a company, even though it is I who handles the moolah and sometimes have the bills in *my* name, when I couldn't get anywhere with them, he always can. Once we were having troubles with our bank, and he actually had the lady behind the desk shaking. I don't know how he does it!

Oh, and turning undesirable dates down? That was always so hard for me. Even the ones who were complete creeps and jerks. I didn't want to hurt their feelings, either. So I often said something along the lines of, "I'm so flattered that you asked; it's a compliment any time a guy asks. But no thank you." And sometimes stammered on after the no-thank-you, trying to make it better.

I'm just not a big meanie. But don't ask my 3 yr old. She'd beg to differ.

Laundromats and Realtors

What do these two have in common? I dunno - but I'm blogging about both in one post. *snicker*

Today was errand day... we hit the laundromat (to wash two sleeping bags we used on the retreat, as our washer can't quite handle them), the post office (Candi, I mailed those clothes back to you today - thanks again!), my uncle's mechanic shop (to pay him for fixing the battery, remember?), and the storage unit. Oh, I have to tell you what I did there, too? Ok, fine. I dropped off the baby carrier I'd used at the retreat. It's one of those you use for hiking or camping. Anyhoo.

While we were at the laundromat, we had a blast. I didn't know that was possible. We ate a quick lunch in there while the bags were washing, then we played. And went a bit nuts. But hey, no one was in the laundromat, and my kids needed to get some energy out. So, we had races. Really. I pushed the baby in the stroller as fast as I could in my straight denim skirt I'm wearing today, and the other three ran and s-c-r-e-a-m-e-d. I might have, too. (Shhh, don't tell. If there was a hidden camera somewhere, I hope it didn't have sound!)

We also did playdough on cookie sheets - it really works well! You don't have leave any mess behind for anyone else to get on their clothes when they fold them on the table.

At first, I felt guilty going out for errands. I kept thinking... what if a realtor calls? What if I miss an important call? Well, that is what my answering machine is for, right? So I put that little bugger to good use... and came back to 3 calls. None of which were emergencies, or I assume so because no one had an audible stroke while leaving their message. I don't know why I do that to myself. And no, I don't have a cell phone. I would like a trac phone (is that what they are called?) for emergencies when I'm away from the house, but that number would not ever be given out except to immediate family. I used to have a cell phone years ago, but found it was more money than it was worth at the time.

Anyway. Laundromats and Realtors.

You can't please everyone

So only work on pleasing... Him.

I have some friends from college, "S" and "S," who have issues with infertility. Try as they might and pray as they did, no babies came. People at their church, friends, and family all made comments like, "Aren't you pregnant YET?" and "Don't you two want kids?" and "When are we gonna hear an announcement?" As you can imagine, this caused them MUCH pain. Then one glorious day, they travelled to another continent with intentions of adopting one little fella... and came back with him AND his older brother. Praise God!

People on the other end of the spectrum are not immune to people's comments, either. We've had 4 (and hope for more!), and I've gotten all sorts of comments. Especially because they've come close together. My grandma constantly brings it up, asking me to not have more. I've got an uncle who is convinced I'm ruining the kids' lives by having more kids. Yes, ruining. He's said so to my face. Not too long ago in a grocery store I got a comment from a man who told me he needed the number of my psychiatrist. Yes, he was meaning about my family size.

During the retreat this weekend, the adults kept saying over and over how lovely it was to go somewhere away from the house and NOT hear things like, "Better you than me!" or "Don't you have a tv?" or "Why would you want this many kids?" or "Don't you know what causes that?"

See, family size is a VERY personal thing. It is really ONLY between the couple and God. If you have no kids, fine by me. If you only have one kid, fine by me. If you only have two kids, fine by me. If you only have 12 kids, find by me. If you have 20, fine by me. I'm not you, or your husband, or God. It isn't any of my business.

You can't please everyone, so don't try. Pray about it; talk it over with your spouse, and do what you feel God is leading you to, whether that is a small or large family. And then ignore anyone who says hurtful comments. And remember... they may not mean to be hurtful. Oh yes, some DO know they are being rude and snarky. But some just stuck their foot in their mouth without even knowing it. They are curious and so want to get that across in a cute and funny way... but they don't actually make in the humor department.

And if you are one of the people who has asked some of these questions, please consider this: how is your question supposed to make those parents feel? Remember S and S? How did they feel when people asked those questions? I know how they felt, because we talked about it. They felt pain. Being unable to have children was on their mind a lot already, and to have those questions levelled at them was painful.

And people who have large families - would you believe that our babies are not always welcomed into the world? Yes. My other grandma doesn't want to hear our announcements. I've friends who, when announcing pregnancies or births, actually get told horrible things about how that baby was a mistake. Several people have had family members get up and walk out of the room in disgust.

The fact is, folks, that family size is so very personal. Just like how much money you make. Or how many times a week you and your spouse have s*x. Think that's not the same thing? Sure it is. Would you walk up to a family member (or worse yet, a person in the store) and say, "How is your s*x life? I've noticed your hubby is grumpy lately." Uhhh, no. And if you did, they'd ask you what business it is of yours. And it is the same thing - many people equate the size of the family with money and irresponsibility with their fertility.

So if you really want to know what is going on in their life regarding family size, whether you wonder why they have no kids or why they have 16, ask it with a genuine heart to understand. When the conversation is over, you may not agree, but so what? They still deserve to be treated with respect and kindness.

The good, the bad, and the ugly

The good: I lost 5 pounds during the retreat, and I feel refreshed mentally and emotionally!

The bad: My van's battery died just before we were going to leave for the retreat and had to be replaced PRONTO, and once we got there, a mouse of some sort was in our cabin that kept leaving little dobs everywhere and woke me in the night because he was digging in our belongings.

The ugly: Sugar-n-Spice was not on her best behavior at all. I almost left the retreat early because of that.

Now, perhaps you are scratching you head about why I feel refreshed after reading the "bad" and the "ugly." Well, I'll tell ya: teenage girls who are servant-hearted and their parents who teach them to be so.

The retreat was held at a camp in a GORGEOUS spot in the hills of Missouri. The girls kept asking me, "Mom, are we in the forest?" We were surrounded by "forest" and huge green fields that held dozens of grazing horses. Beautiful sight. And to get to the horses, my Grand Caravan got to live out it's lifelong dream: to be a Jeep. LOL - seriously, there were some steep hills, and the roads where just gravel. I had to floor it to get up the hill, and man, did we c-r-a-w-l up that hill.

And that's where the 5 pounds of loss came in. We had to walk up and down hills all weekend, carrying our babies and pushing strollers. Can you say "workout?" LOL

This retreat was for families with lots of children. I had one of the smallest families, as I only have 4. The largest attending family had 9. It was such fun and BUSY! But it was also hard work. I had my 4 by myself, and so did my friend "M" - she had her 3 by herself. We had no hubbies to help, and on a thing like this, you really needed an extra set of hands. Especially when a child started acting up. (One of the mothers told me that "M" and I were awfully brave to be doing the retreat without our husbands, and I replied with, "I think I'm beginning to think so, too!") My Sugar-n-Spice showed a lot of her "spicy" side that weekend, particularly on Friday night. She would take off in the opposite direction, and I had to drop the other 2 and run after her (on a hill, lol) with a baby in my arms, then drag her back. Throwing a huge tantrum, of course. I was so frustrated and frazzled by the end of Friday that I told the kids we were leaving the next day. That was it for me. And then along came the mouse that night. Yup, I was going home.

On Saturday, I decided to give it another shot, but if it didn't work, we were indeed going home. But I didn't get that chance. Throughout Saturday, various girls came to "M" and I and would ask, "What can I do?" And it continued on Sunday. Those young women "made" the weekend for me. With them taking a child to the bathroom, holding a tired toddler, allowing me to go get my food, etc, I got to breathe a bit. One of the them, "H," asked me, "When do you take a shower?" LOL! Ah, the age-old question for mothers everywhere, but especially when you are far outnumbered by tiny ones and have no husband around to help. She is one of the oldest in her family, and obviously does not remember the time when her own mother faced that. Now in her family, they not only have the two parents, but about 3 teens! Talk about having help in that family!

One tidbit that had me laughing so hard... a mother there asked me how old I am, remarking that I didn't look any older than her son who was 19. I could not help but laugh. I've always looked young, but I've not gotten a comment like that in awhile - mostly just that I don't look old enough to have 4 kids. So when I told her that I am actually 30, her eyes got pretty big. So funny!

Another wonderful thing - I got to meet 3 families that I will be close to when we move!!! How fabulous! Ready-made friends! (And I got promises of a FABULOUS recipe that we got to sample. When I get it, I will post it for you. You will LOVE it.)

Such a wonderful weekend, though it started with bumps including a van that won't start. Talking with so many humble and godly women was a wonderful way to refill my tank, and seeing their teenagers gave me such encouragment to keep on working and training my little ones for Him. I hope that one day my own kids will be such great young adults!

Going away for the weekend

The kids and I are heading out for the weekend. See you when we return. I hope to have lots of stuff to tell!

Something I never DREAMED I'd say...

Mommy to Sunshine:

"You do NOT brush your sister's butt with your brother's toothbrush!!"

ETA: She actually had her sister's bare bottom exposed and was scrubbing the crack. EWWWW. (Glad it wasn't my toothbrush!)

Starting the process

...of buying our first home!

Wow.

We are moving this month to another state, so we've begun the process for the loan. I am so excited! We really have NO time to do this. I can't believe we are going for it, but we are.

I laugh because hubby wants to be moving into a house June 1st. Those of you who have bought houses are probably shaking your heads at this, no? Well, in his defense, the company we are working with does things a bit differently. Usually people get preapproved for a loan, find a house, then have to actually get the loan. This company does it the other way around. So once we find a place, the money is ready to plunk down right away.

I spent most of the day today finding the financial documents they needed, learning how to scan them into my computer, attaching them to emails (yes, emails - it took 5 emails because there were 24 pages!!!), and talking alternately on the phone with my husband and the loan company. It took awhile, but was relatively painless. Unless you ask Sunshine, who was begging for a turn on the computer while Mommy worked and worked and worked. "Are you done YET?" "Is it my turn?" "Mom, you are taking FOREVER!" (We also had a few chats about attitude, waiting patiently, and speaking with a respectful tone of voice.)

I was joking with hubby that it must be really nice to say, "Talk to my wife; she handles all the paper stuff." I told him that I was his secretary, of sorts, to which he agreed. Then I popped out with, "Hey, and I even get to sleep with the boss!" (Wink)

Some great quotes

From church bulletin:

"What have you done today that nobody but a Christian would?"

From Sting My Heart's post called "My Wander Years":

"Your life is already planned; don’t refuse to follow."