Friday, May 23, 2008

I despise this guilt I seem to fight!

I am so tired of the Guilty Monster whispering in my ear!

I am referring to the stuff we wives and mothers carry around when we aren't doing anything wrong. While we are here with my parents, I had decided to allow myself to do a few things just for *me*. But spending the money is plaguing me - before I actually spend it, while I am spending it, and after I'm spending it!!

And in case you were going to ask - yep, hubby is totally fine with me spending it. He even said, "Do not feel guilty!" to me. But it's there anyway.

I feel the same way about asking my parents to watch the kids while I go get out alone. Mom told me not to feel bad, especially since they adore the kids and look forward to taking care of the kids. Yet, there it is again.

Argh. Am I not allowed to do anything to recharge or give myself a treat? Where does this come from? Who started this nasty cycle? Is it part of being used to putting the kids and husband first, so to do otherwise is hard for me/us?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I hear ya! Only with me, it's not so much money as time. I can never take a "lazy moment" without feeling "naughty". I just found your blog yesterday by the way, and am looking forward to reading more. I read through the Laugh Lines last night. I laughed until I cried! Kids are funny, aren't they? Thanks for making me laugh.

Candi said...

Oh yes---I feel that way at times, too! If I do sneak off, it seems it is near bed time (since that is when dh is home to keep the boys) and then I really feel guilty that I was not home to tuck them in.